No place like home

As I've been feeling a bit home-less recently (yes, I do have a roof over my head and a floor under my feet, it's more of a state of an anxious mind than reality) here's my current checklist for making a place I stay in a home.

Home is where the cat bed is.

The one that cats actually sleep in, because you put it in the Right Place. There is only one Right Place for every cat bed in the house and there are very specific rules as to where the Right Place is, if you get it wrong, no one will sleep in the bed, because it is in the Wrong Place. 

Home is where the Amazon Logistics delivery drivers can find you.

There really should be an app to check which addresses come up on GPS doodahs of Amazon Logistics delivery people and which don't. I lived in a White Zone before. It is like living on a delivery desert.

Home is where the heating works.

I can not stress this enough, in a country of draughty windows, fake double glazing, mould exploding through the walls, unsealed front doors and mysterious holes in random walls, central heating that works is non negotiable.

Home is where the wifi connects automatically.

So that you walk in, take your phone out and go ahhh, I am already online, connected, followed, messaged and liked. So that your digital stalkers and friends are never far away.

Home is where the heart is.

You know, the one in a box. The one you think about when you tell your friends not to mess with you and they laugh and say oh you are so funny, that one. 

Home is...

More ideas?